What did you teach your kids about fighting/bullying?

[chicken_hawk]

My old man was a lousy dad in almost every respect. I went to live with him when I was 13 and I remember when I was 16 he handed me a steel pipe and said some fuys were going to be coming up to start shit (collect money he owed them). My job was to go around the back side of the car and if anyone tried to get out, swing as hard as I could. Upon arrival I did as I was told and stood there like it was an out of body experience while the passenger and my dad exchanged profanities. At some point my old man (and what they didn't and few new was a 1% who was whipped with barbed wire and left for dead upon abandoning the lifestyle) starting tuning this guy up through the car window and when a passenger started to get out instead of swinging my pipe I kicked the door on his leg with all I had. He began screaming and closed the door and as soon as he did Johnny Law came down the drive.

Frankly, it was an awful experience, but I always stood my ground from then on and maybe before. Never and I mean never starting shit, but not afraid (well I was) rather willing to fight if need be. That being said and some really funny fight storied aside I always wanted my kids to be the same. And not getting political but this no fault society has perpetuated bullying IMHO making it difficult to raise your kids the way I was or at least should have been. Aka don't start shit, butndont be afraid to finish it.

So, as I raised my boys I wrestled and tuffened them up but taught them with my wife's approval. If you ever stick up for yourself or someone weaker you will have our full support. But, we can't do anything about the law or school but we have your back. Ironically, all three of my boys had at least one situation where they had to raise their fists. Twice we had their back, once the cops were involved and even said he approved but since it was at school there was little he could do. One time my middle boy popped a 20 something in the nose on the bball court for bullying his friends and my youngest stuck up for one of his buddies landing him in ISS.

Anyway, I wondered is this no fault world how you guy's handled things?

Hawk

[MR. BMJ]

My parents were the same. Don't start stuff, but defend myself if trouble or bullies came around. I never really got bullied, but I was pretty good on not picking on others...maybe just a few times playing around and joking, but not strictly as trying to be a bully or dick.

Back then you got into a fist fight and that was it.

What I see now is a bunch of pussies who just want to pop a gun or knife out. People are afraid of ass-whoopins and getting their pride hurt. I see it more with smaller mouthy guys starting shit, then when you stand up for yourself, they want to pop a gun like a bunch of little pussies. All of this was around when I was a kid and even back with my parents, but it is WAYYYY worse now.

As for my kids, I want them to be raised like I was, but they will have to be smarter in reading situations just because of these pussies growing up resorting to pussy tactics.

[Dawgpound_Hank]

I teach Jr to never start a fight, but if someone bullies him, that he better stand up for himself or that bully will continue to bully him until he does. In short, I told him to punch the kid in the nose as hard and fast as he can, and the kid will never mess with him again haha. He's in Kindergarten, so. I teach him to box and we wrestle all the time. When he gets to be 8 (minimum age around here) I would like to enroll him in a dojo or MMA classes at the gym so he can learn better how to defend himself if need be - but that's only if HE wants to join, I would never force him.

[Roughrydr]

My oldest grandson has had problems with being beat up by other kids. His other grandparents whom the kids live with, asked me to teach him to fight. I did. This was over a year ago. The only problem is now hes getting into trouble because he found out that he'sa large kid and has good power behind his punches. Now he defends himself a little too much over minor things. Even threatening to stab a kid with a pencil. He got kicked out of that school that day. Luckily another school gladly accepted him, his younger brother, and baby sister because they are all honor roll students, and this grandson had the highest math score for 2nd grades in all of Florida and his brother had the highest reading score in the school.
My point, there has to be a balance. You can teach them, but they have to figure it out themselves.
As a side note, the grandkids father, my youngest son, put a kid in the hospital in the 10th grade for calling him fat. So the apple never falls to far from the tree.

[liftsiron]

My son is a big guy, not in the best shape, but cock strong. He's also normally mellow, when he was a 10th grader a senior about a foot taller than him was picking on his tiny little girlfriend. He said to the guy I'll let it go once, but if you ever fuck with me or one of my friends again, I'll knock the shit out of you. Later that day the senior chewed up a pencil and spit into my boy's hair. My son said, what did I tell you earlier? Then proceeded to beat the living shit out of the bully. I had to go to see the principle, no big deal the principle said the senior had a good beat down coming.

He got into one more fight with a senior a few months later, kicked his ass to. No one bothered him the rest of the time he was in school.

[Dakota]

I am with most. Teach my boy not to initiate shit but not to take any. He is a quiet introvert but an elite hockey player and I have work with him on judo. He has been under-estimated twice because hockey players are lean and not huge. Once a kid attempted to steal his new iphone and run. My son has J.H. school records in sprinting and the kid was wearing a hoodie. As my son tells it when he whipped him to the ground by his hoodie at full speed the kids head bounced of the asphalt and sounded like a melon. He picked up his phone and just walked away. Another incident ended in a standing side headlock and he just dropped the kid with a klunk when the kid went out. Even in a big HS word apparently got around to find someone more suitable to being bullied.

[choke]

Definitely.
Started teaching my daughter BJJ and Muay Thai at age 4. She's now 13.
She's used it once in 5th grade when a fucking 8 year old was tuning up her friend calling her a cunt, and trying to rip her hair out. My daughter told him to stop, he said that she was next; then he was on the ground after she put him down with a rear naked like it was her job. Then stood there waiting for a teacher. Principal was pleased. Kids parent's, not so much. Called the principal a racist for siding with my kid, even though the principal was black.

Regardless, it's made all the difference in my daughters life.
She is also, in the pipeline for women's olympic Judo, for real.

[Roughrydr]

I think sports are important in kids lives. It teaches them discipline, the hard work yields reward ethic, team work where team sports are involved, also the idea that it's not just about how good you are but helping everyone on your team be the best they can be. It's too bad the idea of competition is slowly being eroded by the elitist social pogrammers.

[chicken_hawk]

Definitely.
Started teaching my daughter BJJ and Muay Thai at age 4. She's now 13.
She's used it once in 5th grade when a fucking 8 year old was tuning up her friend calling her a cunt, and trying to rip her hair out. My daughter told him to stop, he said that she was next; then he was on the ground after she put him down with a rear naked like it was her job. Then stood there waiting for a teacher. Principal was pleased. Kids parent's, not so much. Called the principal a racist for siding with my kid, even though the principal was black.

Regardless, it's made all the difference in my daughters life.
She is also, in the pipeline for women's olympic Judo, for real.

Oh man, I would have loved to see that...it would have went viral. Thanks for sharing.

Hawk

[chicken_hawk]

I think sports are important in kids lives. It teaches them discipline, the hard work yields reward ethic, team work where team sports are involved, also the idea that it's not just about how good you are but helping everyone on your team be the best they can be. It's too bad the idea of competition is slowly being eroded by the elitist social pogrammers.

I couldn't agree more. Even if a kid isn't the best athlete they will develop all the skills you mentioned and ever so important in life.

Hawk

[Dakota]

I couldn't agree more. Even if a kid isn't the best athlete they will develop all the skills you mentioned and ever so important in life.

Hawk

Every kid should be in a sport that takes some work and doesn't give out participation trophies. Sports prepare one of the real world. Team work, individual effort, dedication, risk, the consequence of too much risk and even politics. All life lessons.

[tobyonekinobi]

My son is thirteen and i told him fights are going to happen its inevitable and its going to hurt but once it starts dont stop till they drag you off of them. Dont just do the one punch and let them get angrier dont ever stop. I also warned him on any given day it was his day to lose you never know what your going against so you better be ready.

[chicken_hawk]

My son is thirteen and i told him fights are going to happen its inevitable and its going to hurt but once it starts dont stop till they drag you off of them. Dont just do the one punch and let them get angrier dont ever stop. I also warned him on any given day it was his day to lose you never know what your going against so you better be ready.

Solid advice brother. Not sure it still applies but my ol man told me, if he says, take the first punch than take it and then more they talk the more scared they are.

Hawk

[GFKINGKONG]

Not a parent but have worked with kids being bullied. I have a brown belt in Judo(dont practice anymore) but when i taught kids classes I would often times have situations where a kid was bullied and the school would punish the kid if they defended themselves. At this point I would sit down with the parents and the kid and ask if they felt their child had the right to defend themselves in spite of school rules. Often times I got a yes and from there we would talk about the difference between instigation, walking away, and when it finally came time to stand their ground. I made sure there was clear communication in that the parent let the kid know not to start anything hut if they had to defend themselves and the school punished them the parent had their back. Judo is a much more violent grappling art than given credit for and I’d been knocked senseless from throws on a mat let alone taking one on the ground. It always brought a smile to my face when the kid would come in and magically had stopped being bullied because the bully “fell”.