GOD works in mysterious ways

[Dawgpound_Hank]

I have two friends who I met through my wife. Guy & girl married, both around 28 or 29. Best people you ever wanna meet. They had been trying to have a child for like 2 years. Finally she get's pregnant last year, due date was March 15. Everything looked to be going great. She goes in for delivery on the 15th, has a c- section, and the baby is dead from the umbilical cord being wrapped around his neck. Completely devastating.

She is an RN & he is an engineer - so being they had top notch health insurance & having all the recent scans & tests, have no idea how this could have happened unless incompetency on the doctor's part. Bananas, you have any input on this bro?

[liftsiron]

Very sad to hear.

[Bananas]

I will get back to you after asking my Ob Gyn colleague. I have not done Obstetrics in 7 years, so my knowledge is useless.

[bufbiker]

What a shame. That must be devastating
My first wife, who's deceased, had a late term miscarriage when our five year old daughter, also deceased, kicked her in the belly one morning as they were coming to visit me in prison my first time in. That was devastating to us. I don't think she ever fully recovered emotionally from thst. I hope your friends have better fortune next time and don't get discouraged, or let this create fear for future attempts.
In case you're curious, first wife liver cancer, daughter heroin od. Don't tell to many people about them. Lots of guilt.

[ozzy69]

Sorry hank

[b52]

That's rough. Sorry to hear my friend.

[blm]

Terrible tragedy. Sorry to hear. Literal lifted to highest of highs and dropped to the lowest of lows. My heart aches man.

[Bananas]

I asked. This was my ob gyn friends response

"When did the baby die? At home? Why did they schedule a c section and not regular labor? Did the baby die at home or did the baby die in the hospital?"

So it seems like it may not be a straight forward answer and obviously pretty personal questions, that you may not want to bring up. Since she is a nurse I am sure she can easily get a second opinion from another ob without much trouble.

[Dawgpound_Hank]

I asked. This was my ob gyn friends response

"When did the baby die? At home? Why did they schedule a c section and not regular labor? Did the baby die at home or did the baby die in the hospital?"

So it seems like it may not be a straight forward answer and obviously pretty personal questions, that you may not want to bring up. Since she is a nurse I am sure she can easily get a second opinion from another ob without much trouble.

Don't know why the c-section. Baby was dead when they took it out of her - at the hospital. I don't have any more details atm. I'm sure my wife will hear more down the road when the girl opens up more after this initial grieving period.

[MR. BMJ]

I've seen this happen more frequently than i'd like to state, unfortunately. They should have been able to not hear the heartbeat at her ObGyn appt's, which as the EDD neared, she should have been seen weekly or biweekly at minimum. This must have happened out of nowhere quickly...assuming the above was followed. I had a good co-worker friend who this happened to and she was in her third trimester (>25 weeks gestational). In the event that no heart beat was found, they could have followed up with an ultrasound.

My condolences go out this couple Hopefully they try again, once they are ready. They are still young, and they just need a little time. having kids is the greatest experience in life.

[bufbiker]

Actually, getting them to move out and take care of themselves is tge greatest experience in life.

[mrhtbd]

My Mother had 8 children to my father. The youngest was named Francis Xavier after the Saint. During delivery he got tangled and they both almost died when his umbilical cord got wrapped around his neck. Caught in labor and with careful handling, both luckily survived the birth. He was a great kid and I was his protector from the 3 older brothers (who had the habit of being complete asses). None-the-less, he remained safe under my protective watch. Then there was a fire (theorized to have been started by the 4 yr old brother between Francis and I) while the rest of us were at school. This fire killed both Francis and my Mother (who was filling the tub, then after being told by the 4 year old there was a fire, alerted the neighbor from the second story window, "Call the fire department, Raymond is up here and I'm going down for the baby!") She then wet a blanket in the tub to cover herself and went down for Francis, the 2 year old... Long story short, both she and Francis died, but Raymond was saved. I was 6 and in 1st grade, was whisked away from school in an old 1940's black sedan with seats so low I couldn't see out the windows; I had to look up. I never got to see the damaged house, wasn't allowed to go to the funeral, and was sent to an orphanage 7 months later where I spend the next 11 years trying to survive before graduating and being told, "Don't come back!" How do I know the details? I'll tell you. In 1980 I joined the Army and went toBasic Training at Ft. Dix, NJ. We got a 3 day pass and not having anywhere to go the Sgt said, "Get out or I'll make you clean the latrines with a toothbrush!" Curious for closure, and not have seen my home in 14 years since leaving for school that morning, I went to SW Philadelphia, to the old neighborhood. Strangely it appeared nothing had changed except the size of the trees. It was bizarre. The house looked like the rest on the block with no apparent changes; same cedar shingles and porch. As I wandered around the block a guy washing his Corvette across the street watched me closely. With a skinhead Army haircut I'm sure I looked out of place. Finally I approached him and introduced myself. I said, "Hi, I know I don't look like I'm from around here but actually I used to live in a house acrossed the street (and I pointed to it)." He said, "The ______ house?" I said, "Yes!" Then he said the strangest thing, he stood up, stopped polishing his hood, looked me straight in the eye and said, "I'm the Fireman who pulled your brother out!" I was completely floored, it was 14 years ago and this protector moved in across the street; unbelievable. So he told the story, how... " your Mother called out to the neighbor ..." Evidently the wet blanket over the head does NOT work! He said my Mother collapsed on the steps and was found below in the living room closet. After the clothes burned and weakened the steps, her weight put her through into a heap in the closet. Of course, I stood through his explaination in complete shock, then without hesitation I asked, "Where did you find the baby (Francis)? He stopped then and hesitated, not wanting more to speak, but it was too late, I had asked too much to now escape the horror. I said in the best cold Army tough I could muster, "Where did you find him?" "Tell me," I said. Then he replied, "He was in the middle of the living room!" Looking through the gates of hell I perced, "What was left of him?" I looked him straight cold in the eye demanding an answer and you know what they say about being careful what you wish for, he said, "He was just a grease spot on the carpet!" Wow, I thought, left in the high chair, seeing the fire knowing Mom was upstairs, he managed to tip over the chair and crawl to Mom as she desperately tried to save him. Umbilical cord wrapped potentiating death for both or living death for one. A tragedy of epic proportion; unfathomable to some and fantastic to all, what a shame. For my part, I met some old neighbors who held me through the weekend and I finished Basic Training filled with pride for protecting my country, but in reality, I have thought of Francis every day. I blocked the major front, the 3 older bothers, but the younger subversive enacted destruction while my back was turned. The official cause of the fire was wiring faults, but in the back of my mind... Always try to be respectful, especially to my brothers, my younger of which I spent years fighting his battles for him, but I harbored resentment and one day unleashed it for what he did to my favorite brother; I threw him through a plate glass window. It was crazy anger, pent up for years and was frightening. I figured I needed to channel it to control it and weight lifting was the only cure. So much, so much. Many here recognize I'm a bit deep, well, there's a bit of the reality beneath the veil. The umbilical story brought it out; two go in, both die now or later, or one survives to carry the curse. The Mother has a cross to bear, but at least they weren't robbed of a personality as well. Therein lies the hell...

[zeke]

Very sad!! Prayers!!

[wallyd]

I couldn't even begin to imagine what they are going through. Very sad.